Personal Narrative: Generalized Anxiety Disorder

I can now play notes higher than I ever could before the musical, leaving me with a hunger for more challenging music. I taught myself to play at fast tempos with little time to think about what I am playing. The latter musical lesson can be applied to life as well. Performing in the musical helped me learn to make decisions quickly. It was stressful at first, but with plenty of practice and not backing down, I was able to achieve my goal and be a part of a great show.

I have personally seen that people have many different layers to them than what they let on. For example one of my friends has a couple mental illnesses that i would not have known if he had not told me and it changed my view of him in a good way. I have also had personal experience when it comes to talking to someone to help relieve some of the stress. Recently home life hasn 't been fantastic and i have had to rely on teachers and therapist to help work out the stress and helping me work through the anxiety. Lastly i have seen That determination for a goal can make you achieve that goal.

Misdiagnosed November was when the pain started. I was dizzy at church one Wednesday night. I did not think much of it. Though, now, I think I should have. Looking back, I should have mentioned it to someone there or I should gone home early, but I did not.

Joining band had an immense and almost immediate impact on my life. Before being in band I had never had a talent that I felt completely confident in. I enjoyed practicing and spent many hours trying to improve my musical ability. In

Out of all the things I would do in high school, nothing would impact me more than joining the North Rangers Marching Band. It would give me more skills than any other aspect of my life that would prepare me for a future and allow me to evolve from a shy child to an adult with skills that prepared me for my future. I went into high school as a shy kid, with no true direction, at least until I discovered my schools marching band. Although coming in two years behind most of me peers, I knew that this was where I was meant to be, and with that, my mind was set and I was determined. Throughout the next two years, I would face countless difficulties with this that felt at times like tests of my willpower and what this band meant to me, but luckily I would push through, and in the end, would be left with a stronger person.

I turned a seeming bad situation into a tool used for my personal growth and achievement. I encourage others who are being oppressed by anxiety to fight back and know that there is an escape. Although I have managed to escape the room, anxiety has not gone from my life. It continues to torment me and try to make me feel afraid. Times when I fell fearful or incapacitating, I rely on my self- awareness and personal strengths.

Music helps me in many ways in my life, such as escape from the routine of everyday life, to dance, to raise my self-esteem and other aspects. I dedicate many hours to music, I like to feel happy, that is why I listen to music moved and happy the longest. When I have a bad day it helps me to feel good, when I have a good day the music makes me feel even better. Music puts me to sleep in times of fear and Solitude. It is not enough for me to just listen to the music, I also like to dance and enjoy it to the limit until I cannot continue because it helps me to be active.

My heart would palpitate while my skin flushed. I could feel myself getting hotter and more nervous as thoughts raced through my head. They weren’t connected, but they felt tied together, stuck. I felt as if my life was on a video reel but the sounds were distorted, and the film was held together by a shaky hand. My teacher looked at me, saying something but all I heard was unintelligible speech, the other students were staring at me while I prayed silently for a sinkhole to open up and remove me from the situation entirely.

I believe that one of the keys to overcome any challenge is to remain calm, not to lose patience and to always be aware that there is a solution to everything. In other words maintaining a positive attitude when in difficult times is always helpful. Another strategy that has helped me overcome challenges in the past is to be physically active, meditate and also to express my thoughts in writing by keeping a journal. I believe past experiences in my life such as, losing my mother to cancer at an early age, being an AmeriCorps volunteer and pursuing a graduate degree in have prepared me to overcome difficult challenges regardless if those are physical, emotional or

“Music is a moral law. It gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything” (Plato). If my childhood was filled with anything: it was imagination. From my earliest memories of my cousin, and I putting on a sold out concert on my papaw’s front porch; to putting my baby dolls to sleep with lullabies. Music has always been a big part of my life: it was the one thing I could always count on, no matter where I went; and that still stands true today.

These symptoms make it difficult for a person to live their life in peace, and overcoming these symptoms is step one to overcoming the disorder. Ordinary day-to-day activities are interrupted because of anxiety and fear. Constant worrying has a huge impact on your mental as well as physical well-being. Symptoms can be emotional as well as physical.

At a young age, I constantly wanted to express myself through music. I always found a way to incorporate music into my daily life, whether it be by blasting my favorite music, creating my own funky songs, or even having the opportunity to participate in my elementary school choir. My love for music actually took flight after I had decided to join my elementary school choir, however, in my opinion, it is not the most transformative moment in my life. After elementary

I experienced horrible social anxiety toward my freshman and sophomore year of high school that gave me many obstacles to jump over. Now, in the midst of my senior year I am doing much better I have drawn out of those experiences not to think of what could go wrong, but to stay at the moment and not stress about the problem that probably won 't ever happen.

Music has always been a part of my life. In definition, it is “vocal or instrumental sounds combined in such a way as to produce beauty of form, harmony, and expression of emotion.” Ever since I was a young child, I have loved music. The strong, steady beats, the entrancing melodies, and the lyrics that vary between heartwarming and heart-wrenching have always had an unexplainable effect on my life. Music seems to have the ability to change certain aspects of my world.

I 'm not going to lie and pretend that I 've completely eradicated my anxiety, because that is far from the truth. Many of the aspects within myself I 've tried to correct, are still within me to this day. I 've been able to muffle that sense of dread rather than fully silence it. Even so, I 'm completely fine with that. It 's unrealistic to think that one could easily remove something that 's been deeply rooted within your psyche.